You Are Stuck With Me
by Ventisquear
Summary: Airam loves Zevran. And this was supposed to be their first time. But it is not easy to overcome the past... oneshot


Based on a kink meme prompt. Airam is my Warden from **Failed To Fail and few other stories. **More about what happened with Templars and who was Tanaris is in the story** Broken Toys. **Set after the Blight.

Special thanks to **Brelaina**, my awesome Beta.

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><p><strong>You Are Stuck With Me<strong>

Zevran's hand slides under his shirt and his heart begins beating so hard, as if it wanted to jump out of his chest. Then Zevran tweaks his nipple, and his breath hitches. Zevran notices, of course, and chuckles softly as he leans to kiss him again, still fondling his nipple, while his second hand is slowly sliding lower and lower, until it is there –

His eyes widen and he stiffens a bit, and he has to remind himself,_ t__his is Zev_.

Zevran pulls off the shirt, but then stops for a moment. Confused, he opens his eyes and sees Zevran looking at him, and there is such a hunger and admiration in the assassin's eyes, he feels blood rushing to his face. Zevran chuckles and leans down to kiss him.

"You are so beautiful," he whispers a bit hoarsely, before he starts kissing his neck, shoulders, chest, every inch of his body. It is nice, much nicer than he ever thought it could be and he closes his eyes, enjoying the pleasure that Zevran's tongue and fingers have to offer.

Then Zevran moves to the breeches and pulls them down, gently rubbing his hand over his smallclothes before removing them as well. He winces and almost tells Zevran to stop, but bites his lip instead. _No. I want this. This is Zev. My Zev_.

He listens to Zevran's gentle, admiring words, his soothing voice that forces him to relax again. And now Zevran is kissing… his… _oh Maker! _He moans and Zevran chuckles softly and takes it all into his mouth. He gasps. He had heard it was good, he was forced to do it for… _them_, but nobody had ever done it to him before. It feels so good… so _good_ he can't stop himself moaning and calling Zevran's name.

But then Zevran spreads his legs a bit and he can feel one finger pressing him _there_ and the whole world twists and shatters –

– and the leader of the Templar is looking at him in that way again, and he says "_Bring your ass over here, elf, and spread your legs"_ and the others are laughing, "_got to train you for the Tower"_ –

– the world twists again and there's Taranis, "_you know you like it, Air, I love you so much, someone so beautiful shouldn't keep his beauty only for himself, come on, let them admire you, don't you love me, Air? Come on, you know you want this, it will be fun" –_

– "_If you want to have some fun, boys, you should do it now, there won't be much left of him after interrogation_," says the voice of Ser Cauthrien, and the guards cheer and he cannot, it's too much and he screams and screams and screams –

"Calm down_, bello mio_, it is all right, you are safe, you are with me, _amore_, please, calm down," someone's saying, and he knows that voice. Someone is holding him in arms, someone strong, but caring, someone smelling of leather –

"Z-Zev," he realizes finally and the world returns to its place.

_Zev is here. Oh thank the Maker, Zev won't let them hurt me_ – but then he suddenly remembers what they were doing – trying to do, and he feels so embarrassed, and, and, what if – what if Zev won't want to stay with him, now that he knows how useless he is? The very idea makes his heart skip a few beats. He clings to Zev even tighter, because what if it is the last time?

Zev holds him, softly humming below his breath, gently kissing his hair from time to time and whispering sweet things in his ear and all he wants is to stay like this, forever.

oOo

He wakes up at the soft creak of a door and immediately realizes Airam is gone. Panic rushes through him, but then he notices that the door to the balcony is slightly ajar. He opens it, and yes, the boy is there, sitting in one corner, hugging his knees, with a blank expression on his face. Damn his impatience. He should have realized, he should have been more careful. After all, Fort Drakon was still rather fresh, and when he remembers the state of his little Warden when they came for him, he regrets he cannot revive those bastards just to kill them again.

He steps onto the balcony and Airam looks up. "You should leave, you know," he says, before bowing his head down again.

"If you need to be alone, I will, but please, come inside. It is cold out here."

"No, I mean – leave me. Find someone else."

He sighs, then scoops Airam in his arms again, and takes him inside. He places him onto the bed and pulls a blanket over him, before sitting next to him. "Now that I'm content you won't die prematurely from pneumonia, could you please explain to me why I should leave you and find someone else?"

"This is not time for your jokes, Zev. I'm serious."

"So am I, _amore_. So please, enlighten me, because I truly do not understand."

"But – you saw."

"Saw what?"

"How I – that I can't," Air sounded almost angry now. "I'm useless. And I know for you it's – important – "

If Airam decided to stab him right in the heart then, it wouldn't hurt more than these words. "I thought you trusted me more. I would never force you in any way – "

"Don't be ridiculous! I trust you more than I trust myself! It's because I _know_ you would never force me that you should leave!"

He blinks, confused, until it dawns to him just what the crazy kid is saying. "You want me to leave because you think sex is so important for me I would be unhappy if I stayed with you."

"You saw it… I love you, and I trust you, but, even so – all I could see and hear were them. And I heard what you said to Leliana, when you found out she didn't have sex for two years… I mean, what if… I might never be able to…"

He can't listen to it any more. "You are unbelievable, you know." He pulls Airam in his arms again and presses their lips together. "There are three things I have to say to that. First – I have told you already, you are stuck with me, whether you like it or not. There is nothing in the whole world that could make me leave you. It took too much effort to keep you alive for me to just walk away now."

"But – "

"Second, what happened was not your fault and I do not want to hear you blaming yourself for it ever again. If you want to blame someone, blame me. I know what happened and I should have been more patient. I'm sorry."

"No, that's not – "

"Hush, you impossible brat. At least listen just this once to what I have to say, hm? And I say, do not worry about it. We will take it slowly. And if it takes two years, well, at least I won't have to worry about seducing a kid."

"Watch your tongue, you silly assassin. I'm the Hero of Ferelden, not a kid," Air scowls in mock anger.

He chuckles. "Hero or not, as far as I know, you are still not even twenty-one. Which makes you _a kid_. And you should be respectful to your elders. But. There is still the third thing… do you want to hear it or not?"

"Sorry, grandpa. I'm listening." Airam is leaning against him now, and even though he can't see the boy's face, he knows he's smiling now.

"Well… judging by your reactions earlier, it seems… we only have to avoid, ah… certain parts, yes? … And that leaves us a lot of room for many pleasant activities," he whispers into his ear and then licks it, lightly. He chuckles when Airam's breath hitches again and turns him for a kiss.

"So, the third thing is," he continues, when they finally break the kiss, "you really should not underestimate my skills."

"Then stop talking and show me, silly assassin."

"Why yes, ser," he grins, before pulling away and laying them both down again. "At your command."

Such challenge cannot go unanswered, after all.


End file.
